Baby Bumblebee

Gotta stop squashing my own bugs.

It's come to my attention that this may be the biggest obstacle that I have to finding my one true love. I can and do kill my own creepy crawlies and that just means that I don't need anyone else to do it for me... so clearly I'm not putting the right signals out into the universe and somehow all the decent, eligible guys have already gotten the memo. Damnitalltohell.

Sure, I could blame the extra 30 (fine, 40)lbs and consistent one-inch roots. Or the fact that I luuuuuv my couch and He isn't already camped out on it with me every night. Perhaps my general tepid attitude towards -- good God, gag me with a spoon -- "putting myself out there" might have a lil' something to do with all this sleeping alone. But seriously - I'm onto something with this bug thing. Really.

Have been putting an excessive amount of thought into this (mostly 'cause I've been @ Lisa's lately and therefore have been massacring more bugs than usual - so sorry little guys) and it does makes sense. I don't *need* anyone for anything. Corny as it is -- the shoes on my feet (I've bought 'em), the house I live in (I've bought it), the car I'm driving (I've bought it)... All that means is I really do just depend on me. Damn you Destiny's Child - why didn't you warn me that this independence pendulum could swing tooooo far left of center into chronic single-dom?

So it's settled. I'm gonna work on needing other people for things. Preferably other really tall, sorta geeky, kind, generous, funny and smart people who are willing to, not only squash perfectly harmless insects for me, but who might also make me pee my pants laughing, who might be able to carry His own and to keep up. It wouldn't hurt if He could overlook my many and myriad flaws while at it. Too much to ask?

Well, if you've seen Him, tell Him I just moved to Colorado and am totally ready to hand over all the flip-flops and rolled up magazines. I won't be needing them any longer once He's on the scene to handle this whole bug situation. What a relief!
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